Creep it real with these Halloween costumes

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By Lorin Alukonis

Illustration by Lorin Alukonis

Halloween is the perfect time to be the center of attention and show just how witty you are, and what better way to do that than through your costume? You can finally be crowned as the funniest and quirkiest friend without being judged by everyone in your trick-or-treating group. Follow these costume ideas for this spooky season to prove you are superior to all of your peers and become the ultimate comedian.

Obviously, the best, and easiest, costume to wear is a white lie t-shirt. Just grab any white t-shirt, and write a lie in Sharpie, pretty simple right? Wrong! Your lie cannot be any basic lie; it has to be something that is very unique to you so that when people read your shirt, they automatically think of your pretty, little face. Why not try something like this: “I don’t eat all the food at parties” or “I don’t stay up all night working on homework because my time management is such a small construct that I’ve built into my schedule.” Come to think of it, maybe the short and sweet lies work better; we don’t want to spread bad habits to others now do we? A white lie costume can be used as a conversation starter and a way to win the prize of attention for a few minutes. 

This next costume is one made specifically for the cutesy couples that make everybody green. One person dresses up as an avocado, and the other dresses up as a cow with a halo. Get it? It’s Holy Guacamole. This costume is the perfect ‘innocent-yet-funny’ look that everyone will wish they’d thought of. It’s certainly hilarious, and if you think it’s cheesy, maybe reload this page on the website, so it can inspire you to reload your lacking sense of humor. This is so easy, literally anyone can achieve the look; put on some kind of green dress or shirt and cut out a large brown circle to tape in the center of your clothing. The alternative option is printing out an avocado emoji to show that you’re cool–effortlessly cool; the cow is the exact same concept. Wear some kind of shirt or dress that is white and paint/color in the black spots. Lastly, top your amazing piece off with a cheap halo from Amazon and holy cow, you’ll look great. You see, that same joke never gets old!

This next costume gives you a bit more creative freedom since the whole idea is taking the literal meaning of words. For example, dress up in yellow, and write “Butter” on yourself. Add a pair of wings and goggles, and boom. You’re a  “Butter-fly!” This concept has so many different alternatives, and it really allows you to show just how “not like the other girls” you are. If you still need some more inspiration though, one option is “French Toast.” Simply wear the stereotypical French outfit that includes a striped shirt, red scarf and a black beret. Next, slap a piece of toast on you, but don’t worry; this statement doesn’t need to be taken literally. You can easily print off a cartoon toast to continue the facade of effortless and glowing sarcasm. There’s also the ever so popular “Deviled Egg” costume. Put on the classic devil costume that is definitely hidden in your closet somewhere, and add a picture of a cooked egg on your shirt. For the final idea, an honorable mention goes to “Dunkin Donuts.” I know it’s hard to not instantly think about “The Charli” when mentioning this costume, but you should have learned by now that all of these ideas are sarcastic and not what they seem. Throw on any basketball jersey with some sweat bands, and use a pool floatie shaped in a circle to paint as a donut. If you’re not up for that challenge, you can just buy a donut pool floatie– the choice is yours. It is guaranteed people will look at you like you’ve gone crazy while they try to figure out why in the world you are dressed like a stick of butter, french toast, or a donut that plays basketball, but it’s worth it because you have to be different from everyone else; you are built differently. You’re not like anyone else, and you must be sure to let everyone else know that.

It’s important to wear a ridiculous costume if you want people to ask questions about you. Yeah, you’ll have to explain the meaning to everyone who asks, but that’s exactly what you were aiming for. You can even use these absurd ideas and put your own catch phrases to use, or you could just be like every other basic person, and look up ‘cute DIY Halloween costumes 2020’ on Pinterest to find the whole school doing the same thing. If these are too mentally stimulating and funny for you, just go as COVID-19. That’s bound to be an overused joke. Whatever costume you choose to wear, remember to wear a mask, and have a safe Halloween.

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Lorin Alukonis, junior, is excited for her first year as the features editor on “The Roar” news staff. She enjoys playing club and high school volleyball in her free time as well as late night drives with her friends. Her favorite types of music to listen to are indie pop and throw-back 2000s songs; she also loves meeting new people and becoming friends with everyone. One of her life goals is to explore Europe and learn about the fascinating history and culture.